Prague and Beyond

« Return to Czech Republic

Lima to New Jersey, New Jersey to Amsterdam, Amsterdam to Prague. Screw culture shock, let’s talk about fatal electrocution! Spanish and Portuguese is still swirling in my head, and suddenly people are talking as if they’re singing Bohemian Rhapsody in Elfin, with swollen tongues. Ice blue eyes are the norm, and meals arrive at the table with too much cabbage. Welcome to Eastern Europe, and part two of my Modern Gonzo adventure.

In Lima, I ate ceviche, caught up with old new friends, got some rest and kissed South America goodbye. As time passes, we naturally remember the good and forget the bad, and I was only in Newark for a few minutes before the “coolness” of South America really hit home. In Rio, I was greeted by a gorgeous student at the Info Desk, who proceeded to look for a hostel, and talk about stuff, and smile and show genuine concern for another gringo with red eyes. In Newark, New Jersey, I was greeted by a thick-drawled obese woman who did not take her eyes off her fingernails while telling me she couldn’t help, before I had even asked her for it. After paying no more than $10 for accommodation these last few months, I was trying to avoid paying $80 for a crap room in the Days Inn. But this is New York, and a taxi alone to a youth hostel would cost about $40. I had one day to kill and a camera to buy, so after spending too much time in the airport than is necessary for one’s sanity, I bought the bullet and found a cheap motel on the turnpike. One night cost more than a week’s accommodation in South America. New Jersey was sweltering with humidity, seemingly populated by a tribe of people with pants around their sweaty armpits. Within walking distance from the motel were several strip malls, so I proceeded to find my new camera, running across the busy highway like a game of Frogger. Pedestrian shopping at strip malls on the interstate is a unique US experience. By the time I had bought a Canon Powershot, I had run across the highway at least a dozen times, and earned two bonus lives and 1000 points.

I arrived in Prague like a bushman arriving in Las Vegas. Europe is so different, so old, so…Europe. I planned to get online at the airport, but the airport didn’t have any Internet connection. Fortaleza, north-east Brazil had wireless and internet cafes, but in Prague, one of the most popular tourist destinations on the planet, all I got were blank stares with blue eyes. I would have to lower my expectations, now that I had arrived in the first world. I caught a bus and the metro (not punching my ticket and risking a $30 fine because I didn’t know you were supposed to punch your ticket) and finally, finally, arrived at a hostel just outside Old Town. I had been in transit for three days, so the massive soft pillows and real mattress in the hostel seduced me. I slept for 9 hours in the afternoon, jet lag be damned. Note to self: Don’t mess with jetlag, or get used to listening to all-night snores of those around you.

Gonzo Gallery for Prague and Beyond

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