Honeymoon for One in the Maldives

« Return to Maldives

They set the clock forward at the Soneva Gili, a chance for guests to enjoy extra daylight, another opportunity to literally leave the world behind. Four nights pass quickly, the days busy with getting the images that will leave our viewers salivating. We overstuff ourselves with fresh fruit juices, outstanding breakfasts, dream salads, themed buffets, a quality of food that will continue to nourish the mind long after the it has fed the body. I give a couple more Skype tours, and my dad reckons I’ll never be able to go back to normal living. I don’t have much of a choice. We bid farewell to our dream villas, the long jetties, the ever-smiling waiters, the white numbered bikes, the chilled cellar, healthy organic farm, the dive shop, the pontoons, the pup reef sharks, the playful hermit crabs, the lone coconut tree in the lagoon, the water hammock, the table tennis hut (Smooth Esrock Defeats Strong Cable Yet Again!) the catamaran, tennis court, cocktails, the large sting ray that feeds below villa number 41, the water, the stars, the photos on the college dorm wall of my imagination. Yes, it is better to have tasted, because that’s what you hold on to when you find yourself in a dark, musky el-cheapo hotel, a grating ceiling fan blowing reality straight back into your face.

Male is small, busy, overcrowded to the point of rotating residences since 100,000 people, half of all Maldivians, live on this small island. Narrow spaghetti streets are by with shops with a fondness for mobile phones and knock-off Ray Bans. Without the sea to dive into, the heat burns a cavity in my chest, the black exhaust from scooters sputter with the spit of the Bangladeshi labourers drilling outside my brown-stained window. We are told to carry our passports at all times, a man accosts us minutes off the island shuttle and pleads with us to tell the world about the political corruption in the country. Our overpriced hotel reeks of mothballs, the leaky shower sits above the toilet, the pillows are hard and lumpy. At least my room doesn’t have the smell of a decomposing corpse, although Paul was not as lucky. Chris gets a fever, Sean loses his appetite. Fortune graces us with Canadians Leita and Gerard, who live in Male where Gerard is a floatplane pilot. They treat us to a night of domestic normalcy (superb Thai takeout and some of their limited monthly liquor supply), holding back the weight of reality that might have crushed our spirits entirely. We’ve been put back in our place, taken back to our station. Yet I can always close my eyes and see myself biking slowly along the illuminated narrow wooden jetty towards my villa. The mercurial turquoise sea laps against the pylons, a cloud streaks across the sky beneath small lamps of stars.

Then I open my eyes, call up the schedule for next week’s assignment in Sri Lanka, and realize the honeymoon is far from over. My relationship with the road, while no longer quite new, is determined to maintain a period of unusual harmony.

The Relax Inn
Male, The Maldives

Very special thanks to Kurt, Billel, Katarina (Austrian & Swedish), Russell, Suzy, the Brocks, Leita, Gerard, and everyone at the Soneva Gili Resort. For more info (or to just ogle at some incredible luxury resorts), visit: www.sonevaresorts.com

Gonzo Gallery for Honeymoon for One in the Maldives

view full gallery

Tweet