Cancun to Palenque, the Whole Enchilada

« Return to Mexico

I once heard this story that Corona beer is the only beer guaranteed to be 100% shit-free. Apparently they once found traces of human shit in the beer (from the water, I hope) and instituted some super expensive, super advanced “shit detector” to ensure that would never happen again. Subsequently, while many a beer tastes like pee, and more than few like shit, I’m finding Corona to be absolutely delicious. Along with Sol, and whatever beer is placed in my hand. Moving on…

Palenque is a small jungle town built up around its magnificent ruins and a seemingly endless supply of shoe shops. My final adventure for this week involved a fascinating ruin expedition, including a wild jungle walk exploring the rubble of Mayan ruins yet to be restored. At one point, I entered a collapsed stone room beneath the ground, and a bat flew into my head. It’s a good thing I didn’t see the snake either (apparently I almost stepped on it) but for all my worldwide jungle walks, this one was the real deal - bats, sweat, thorns, mud, spring water, ancient ruins. I even ate some live termites, and they don’t taste like chicken. They taste like dirt. Like Indiana Jones, I also had a close call losing my hat, reclaimed from a bus with a sprint to the station, and a dash of luck. Not today, buddy! Anyway, the Palenque ruins are surrounded by hills and jungle, and feature ancient artifacts that erased any doubt as to the overall scariness of the Maya. Blood rituals, teeth sharpening, skull flattening, penis bleeding - plus, if any European explorer were to have discovered the Mayans and looked up in astonishment, that is, looked up at the sky, the Mayans would have poked our intrepid explorer’s eyes out as was their custom. For all their celestial genius, the Maya used reflective pools of water to scan the stars. Looking up was forbidden, and also ensured that nobody could challenge the priests’ authority when it came to the stars. Says our guide:
“The people with the information kept it from the workers so they could control them.” The parallels with modern society continued to amaze me.

Following ruins and jungle, and with the gracious assistance of Roberto from the TTMM Travel Agency, I went for an extraordinary dip under the kind of waterfalls you only see in movies. Mexico continues to blow me away with its culture, cuisine and beauty - and the deeper into the Yucatan I travel, the more ridiculous holiday destinations like Cancun and Puerto Vallarta become. The real Mexico, I have discovered, has so much more to offer.

To conclude: There are, perhaps, few places left in the world where I would happily dance on a table to the Village People. But after a night of pizza and drinking games, that’s where my Tucan group ended up, and soon enough I’m YMCAying away on a table as a crowd of local Mexicans (and my fellow travellers) scream for flesh. Next thing I know, I’m sandwiched by two hot Mexican girls (cross that one off the list). We had gone through about four dozen beers, when Val exclaimed, loudly: “this is going to be a great trip!”
No arguments from me.

Hotel Kashlan
Palenque, Chiapis

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