Eat, Sleep, Play - Thailand
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Thailand is a budget traveler’s dream; cheap food, cheap transport, cheap hotels, cheap booze, cheap massages, and with all these drunk Brits from Essex about, cheap sex (although you’ll hate yourself in the morning). Here are the various places I found myself, should you happen to find yourself there too.
EAT
Bangkok
Khaosan Street Food - The ladies cooking pad thai on the street know their noodles. It’s delicious, fast, cheap, and best of all, safe on the tummy. Just add peanuts.
Cafe Delhi - We seem to be having a run of Indian restaurants of late, but this place stands head and shoulders above the rest. It’s located in the courtyard off “mini-Khaosan”, the strip a block away to the right from Gullivers. If you can find a more sensational Chilly Paneer, I’d like to know where. With the eggplantlicious baigan bharta and garlic naan, you’ll eat like a king for a fiver.
Khaosan Restaurants - The menus are pretty much the same, the prices too, so it stands to reason that green curry chicken here pretty much tastes like green curry chicken there. I did have a great pizza from Trattoria Pizzeria Gelateria, some fresh falafel from a sandwich joint and delicious fruit banana shakes.
Chabad House - Hand it to the Israelis for this new, superb quality, huge portions for chump-change restaurant. Home-made schnitzel, enormous fresh falafels, chicken soup (for the soul too), gefilte fish! The fruit shakes are kosher too. Parallel to Khaosan Road.
Chiang Mai
Jerusalem Cafe - Needing a break from the Thai or market foods, pop in here for some awesome Mediterranean flavours; fresh, crispy falafel, humus, tahina, kofta etc, served with hot pita bread. Closed on Fridays. 35/3 Moon Muang Road
The Indian Place - There was a sign offering the business for sale, so not sure if it’s going to be around much longer but this Mom and Pop Indian joint served up comfort Indian food that had Minesh salivating. Fantastic chai too, and try the delicious Indian pizza for something different. Soi 9 off Moonmuang Road (down the road from Bow Guesthouse) Update: Closed down.
The Local - Full marks for the fresh schnitzel and greasy-spoon breakfast at this English-owned pub. Besides the friendly staff, chill atmosphere, pool table and late night sport games on a big screen, the Local felt like, well, a local. Soi 9 off Moonmuang.
Phuket
Napoli Restaurant - If you’re tired of the “Same-Same” menus, Napoli had delicious food for the Italian soul, great pizzas and generous doses of balsamic vinegar. In Patong, it’s tourist prices all the way, but you could do a lot worse than this joint, run by an actual I-talian named, of course, Tony. Just off Beach Road, near the Post Office.
SUCK AWARD - I watched two couples get up and storm off, but still didn’t listen to the warning signs. We’d had such a great run with Indian of late, so even the name, Kwality Indian, didn’t put us off. We hadn’t finished eating when tummy’s struck out in protest. The kitchen was slack, the food too rich for a king, and the staff clueless. Stay away at all costs, and God bless those charcoal pills.
SLEEP
Bangkok
Khaosan Palace Inn - Across from the “Center”, which is the largest and liveliest of the bars on Khaosan, the Palace is clean and safe and steps away from a 7-11, pharmacy, bank machine, tourist info, bar and shops. Great location, nice enough rooms, but otherwise friendly staff let me down at the end with more focus on money than hospitality.
Craft House - About half the price of Palace Inn (ie $2 instead of $5 a night), you can see why. Still, the bed was comfy, the room clean, you could padlock your own door and on Khao San, you’re right next to everything you need.
Kawin Place - If the Palace Inn was too much and Craft House too little, Kawin Place is just right. It’s located behind the Centre bar, so location is spot on, but it’s quiet, clean, cheap, but thankfully without that popular crackhouse decor. 86 Khaosan Road (walk down the alley to the left of the Centre, just past the Southeast Shipping Co). T: +66 2281-7512. E: kawinplace@yahoo.com
Chiang Mai
Bow Chiangmai House - A fantastic find on a quiet, yet vibey street, Bow is modern with spotless rooms, great bathrooms (hot shower heaven), A/C, satellite TV, and helpful, gentle staff. A great deal and cut above anything else I saw, about 400b for a double and worth every baaaaaaaaht. 15 Soi 9 Moonmuang Road, T: 053.211707
Eagle House 2 - Basic traveller-fare owned by Irish expat with all the traveller services and basic conveniences. After two days they asked us to leave because, it appeared, we had booked a tour with another company. When I told them so, they seemed genuinely affronted but no guesthouse asks you to leave because your two days are up (especially in Thailand where no reservations are taken). Spend $1 more and walk 10 mins up the road to Bow, it’s better, safer, cleaner and quieter. Might have been a bad day, but Eagle House piddled me right off.
Phuket
Hyton Leelavadee - If you’re travelling with your boyfriend or girlfriend, treat yourself to these lovely rooms and pool half the usual prices. Bare in mind that I saved $$$ by booking through an agent near the the airport (1600b a night), the hotel charged more (2000b a night). Service ain’t great, but the rooms are big, with A/C and balconies, the room service was tasty, and the sit-down big showers are perfect for honeymooners.
Patong Sub Inn - Alternatively, if you’re budgeting and plan to spend a few nights chasing hookers and she-males, the Patong Sub Inn was good for the price (800b a night for double), with A/C, Satellite TV, power shower and close to the action. .
PLAY
Bangkok
The Center - Not sure if this is its name, but that’s what we called it and no sign says otherwise. The biggest, liveliest bar on Khaosan Road, with ladyboy staff, cheap beer and sidewalk tables for people watching. Upstairs is the Shamrock Irish bar with a live band who don’t suck, even if they are too loud. Apparently the owner pays the cops a hefty fee each month so that the bar can stay open when others close at 1am.
Pingpong - You can’t visit Bangkok without checking out the vagina circus of a ping pong show. Nothing sexual about it, just physically impossible groinal feats. Costs about 500-700 baht ($10-15) for entrance with a drink. Every taxi driver or tuk-tuk can’t wait to get you to one for a commission.
Kickboxing - Rip-off zone. Sounds like fun until you see the “Foreigner” prices - about $40 a ticket! If cash isn’t a problem, it should be interesting, although I heard mixed reports.
Gullivers - Loud and lively travellers bar at the top of Khao San. Air-conditioned, which somehow means the drinks cost 25% more than at the other bars. TV’s tuned to soccer games, body search before entrance. you get the picture.
Pratunam Market - An enormous market area that spans several blocks, including the narrow alleyways selling designer-ware for cheap-cheap. The mall across the main street has hundreds of boutique ladies stores…take a wad of cash and lose yourself.
Chiang Mai
Rock Roots and Reggae - One of the best and vibiest bars I’ve been to anywhere, primarily because the reggae band rocked out in their own, stoned and special kind of way. Always buzzing, it’s relaxed and chilled and cheap and outdoors and whereveer else you end up, you’ll probably want to see the night out here. Located near Eagle House 2 on the bar strip (follow the rastaman). Update: Still there, three years later!
Kickboxing - 400b (quarter price than Bangkok) in an authentic arena, it’s a great night out to watch little kids whack each other with utter respect. It’s always skinny vs stocky, and the English announcer helps when the cheap beers start flowing. Mostly tourists, but well worth it.
Night Market - a quick taxi ride away, the Night Market in Chiang Mai is pretty big and pretty good.
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